Here’s the wedding toast by The Bestest Dude:

While watching the Euro 2008 Final, I realized the perverse majesty of listening to a guy with a heavy Scottish accent say the following things:

- “look at him inject the piss into that”
- “you can see the bleeding - may be a couple of quick stitches or the staple gun again”
- “get that blood and stem it from coming out of the eye”
- “he was earlier denied by the woodwork”